Finding Your Purpose on The Unknown Road: Blood, Sweat, and Fears

“Have no fear of moving into the unknown. Simply step out fearlessly knowing that I am with you, therefore no harm can befall you; all is very, very well. Do this in complete faith and confidence.”

– Pope John Paul II

Driving The Unknown Road

There isn’t a travel agent worth their salt that would send you on a cruise without a final destination or an airline that would sell you a ticket without knowing where you were flying to. It’s unlikely that you’d drive across the country without some sort of map, app, or directions scribbled somewhere, but that’s exactly what I’m asking you to consider doing: Leaving the destination to God, The Universe, or simply destiny or fate.

The most rewarding journey you will ever embark on is the one with no precise destination. Believe that. You need to aim in the general direction of where you want to be, but will ultimately arrive at the place you are supposed to be, not where you think you should be.

To find your true purpose in life, your calling, or that thing you were born to do or be, you must go someplace you’ve never been, and that means traveling the unknown road. This journey will take faith, dedication, and grit, and will leave you wondering why you didn’t embark on this journey long ago. Put complacency and security back on the shelf and join me.

The Journey

Imagine yourself embarking on the road trip of a lifetime. The ultimate journey. The kind of journey you will never forget because it’s a journey that never really ends. You live this journey. The journey becomes part of you and you part of it. Your journey guides your every step. Sound crazy? Probably.

This will be a white-knuckle journey, kind of like driving at night in a blizzard, on icy roads, with bald tires. You can see just far enough ahead to stay on the road, and that has to be enough – because that’s as good as visibility in a blizzard gets. If you’re like me, you’re shitting your pants a bit, have a death grip on the steering wheel, and take things really slow. It’s a journey you can’t really prepare for, but a journey you absolutely must be on. Bald tires are what you’ve got, and there is no way around the storm. You just need to drive through it.

Fear of the Unknown

You embark on your trip and think you know where you’re going – where logic tells you to go, where your friends and family suggest you should go, where your career and society says you ought to go, but you’re headed none of these places. This journey is one of faith: Between you and God, a Higher Power, the Universe, or your gut. This is a journey of faith into the unknown.

You drive through the night and arrive at what you think is your destination, but discover it’s just a rest area. You fuel up and check the weather, discovering the storm isn’t ending anytime soon. You look at a map and can’t find the road you’re on anywhere. You see plenty of roads leading to well marked and well known destinations, but that isn’t where you’re heading. Not today. You could get a room for a night or sleep in your car hoping the storm will pass, but realize you’re just putting off the inevitable. You just need to get back in your car and keep driving on the unknown road.

The further into the storm you drive, the more confident you become, but that’s just because you’ve become used to driving on the unknown road. Your tires are still bald and you cannot afford to buy new ones. Strangely, these bald old tires have just enough tread on them to grip the road, but just barely. If you drive too fast, you spin out. If you slow down too much, you get stuck. You’ve got what you’ve got. So long as you keep trudging along at a reasonable pace, you’re fine. You make progress. You arrive at the next exit and find another rest area. This one has a well weathered, barely readable map. It reads:

YOU ARE ON THE UNKNOWN ROAD. YOU ARE HEADED IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION. KEEP GOING.

Driving the Unknown Road one Mile at a Time

In 12-step recovery, the slogan One Day at a Time helps recovering alcoholics and drug addicts focus only on what’s right in front of them – the day. If the day is too much, focusing on the hour is better. If an hour seems too overwhelming, focusing on one minute at a time is sufficient. This concept isn’t new, of course, nor does it only apply to individuals in recovery. It can apply to you – and really work – if given a fair chance.

Getting a mile down the road in these conditions seems to be impossible, so you shift your focus to the clock on your car radio and count the minutes. That’s just fine, and that has to be enough for now. You’re tired, a bit stressed, and the road gets icier and the snow heavier. Now that you’re taking this journey one minute at a time, you’re not as tense. You’re getting used to driving in bad weather but it still isn’t easy. You know by now that the road, though scary, is safe – so long as you keep moving.

Another rest area, another tank of gas, and another weathered map  – this time, the words:

FAITH AND HARD WORK WILL CONTINUE TO FUEL YOUR JOURNEY ON THE UNKNOWN ROAD. REST UP AND KEEP MOVING.

Don’t Lose Your Momentum

Another several hours and it’s still snowing. The roads are still icy, and your tires still have just enough tread to keep you moving safely.  You search for the next exit but don’t see one. You are now running on fumes, it’s still pounding snow, and you’re exhausted. You begin to doubt why the hell you ever started this journey. You begin to lose faith – the very thing that’s fueling this epic adventure. Every bone in your body wants to give up. You squint through the snow and darkness as you try to make out the words on a billboard up ahead:

ALL IS WELL. KEEP MOVING IN THIS DIRECTION.

You’re confused. What is well? Keep moving in what direction? What’s ahead? When does this road end? If it does, what will you find? You continue driving for what seems like days. Just as you begin to lose faith, you notice that the snow seems to be letting up. The clouds are passing, and you see the sun rising. You’re now able to see the road ahead. You loosen your death grip on the steering wheel and take a deep breath. You’ve pushed through what felt like a never ending storm and have lived to tell about it. You’ve arrived. Or have you?

The Unknown Road Never Ends

It’s all too easy to rest on your laurels and get comfortable in life. The same old routine, day in and day out. Nothing changes, and life lacks purpose and excitement – the healthy kind of excitement found only on the unknown road. The old adage “Life is an adventure!” sounds great. You’ve heard it all: Face fear. Get uncomfortable. Do something you’ve never done. Take risks. Work your ass off. Put in the miles. Move the damn needle. Exercise. Read more shelf-help books. Listen to motivational podcasts and YouTube clips. Post inspirational quotes on social media. Be more. Do more. It’s all been done, some of it very well, some of it badly, but there is always something missing:

Faith.

Faith in God, the universe, creation, destiny, or whatever you choose to put your faith in. Faith is the fuel of the unknown road. You can, and should, have goals. Don’t get that part twisted. It’s a good idea to have a plan, but leave the results to faith. There is only so much you can plan for. Yes – work your ass off. Take healthy risks. Go explore. Do things you’ve never done, but leave the results to the unknown. To faith.

Complacency Kills

Do you feel like your life is an adventure, or are you living your life following predictable, well marked roads? Complacency kills the human spirit. It will kill yours and it will kill mine. It’s a slow, spirit death that sucks the life out of you on the installment plan, and you don’t even realize it’s happening. I’m giving you permission – hell, I’ll even sign your permission slip – to stop living this way.

You have a dream somewhere inside you. An idea for a book. A vacation you want to take. A career move you’ve been thinking about. A person you’d like to date. A fitness journey you’d like to begin. An idea for a business. The best things in life – goals, dreams, ideas – don’t have maps. The road to get to where you’d like to be has never been traveled before, and you’re the only one that knows the way.

Fuel up your tank and get driving.